2011 is upon me!

It's now 2011 can you believe it?  I've been tidying up around my home because I really do want to be more organized this year.  My closet is full of so much stuff and clothes I don't even remember owning.  I know I've made this resolution in years past, and all I can say is that I hope I'm more successful this time around hee hee.  I'm typing this from my newly put together "scrapbook room" and I'm so giddy to have my own creative space that isn't my cluttered bedroom.  I live in a 2 bedroom/2 bath apartment.  I have a small kitchen, a dining room and a living room which is a pretty good size for being just me here.  

2010 was a different kind of year for me for sure.  I feel like everything I knew about myself and my life up to now was as it should be.  I found out how to live with what I have and not to want more stuff.  I didn't shop or do stuff for me I had a drastic change that forced me to rethink what it means to be on my own.  I used to have a HUGE paycheck that was reduced tremendously.  I'll go as far to say I learned to live on less than 1/2 of the salary I was accustomed to.  I used to take care of everyone else and never myself.  I used to be the one to pick up the check at dinner almost every time.  I used to buy things for everyone else except for myself.  What is so hurtful is that all these people sort of disappeared from my life after my bank dried up.  I guess what they say is true in that you'll know who your true friends are when things like this happen to you.  

I have a brother who is one of my best friends and two other girls that are my closest friends.  I have no other friends really.  It's sad to say, but I found it to be true.  Sadly my 2010 was one spent a lot of the time alone in my apartment.  I had LOTS of time to reflect on my life and what I'm doing next.  I used to have everything planned and then I didn't.  

What I want for my 2011 is simplicity, organization, fun, and creativity for myself.  I want to find my happiness in 2011.  I hope I will blog more of my journey on this thing.  We'll have to see about that one.  I have a problem letting go of upset feelings and moving past things.  I don't know that I will ever change, but I also recognize I have some broken relationships with my immediate family.  At the moment I don't see them and I live about 15 minutes away from them.  My life seems simpler when I'm at home alone where there is no family drama.  I don't feel the sense of being comfortable or safe at my parent's home or around my family lately.  I can't explain it better than that right now.  

Here's to 2011 may it be a growing and fabulous year!